Before I was afflicted, I went astray, but now I obey your word. You are good, and what you do is good; teach me  your decrees. ..  I keep your precepts with all my heart…I delight in your law. It was good for me to be afflicted so that I might learn your decrees. The law from your mouth is more precious to me than thousands of pieces of silver and gold…Your hands made me and formed me; give me understanding to learn your commands. May those who fear you rejoice when they see me, for I have put my hope in your word.  Palm 119 67-74

I first wrote and underlined this passage in my Bible in June of 2011. I had just gotten home from the hospital after a bout with my asthma. This time the Lord did a lot of work while I was there. I have come home tired! He sold my sofa to one of the nurses and everywhere I turned there was someone to share with! My roommate, her husband, my nurses, even my student nurses. It really was glorious! And this was the scripture the Lord gave to me.

I know O Lord, that your laws are righteous, and in faithfulness you have afflicted me. May your unfailing love be my comfort, according to your promise to your servant. Let your compassion come to me that I may live, for your law is your delight…I will mediate on your precepts…May my heart be blameless toward your decrees, that I may not be put to shame.

Then the Lord brought me back  there 2 months later. ..It seems I hadn’t been studying His precepts thoroughly enough, nor did I have an adult’s comprehension of the passage-just a child’s. So I prayed-and prayed that he would give me a hope that this feeling  would be understood as an adult. To that end, He started giving me passages on health. I always thought they were for someone else-more deserving-but on  August 26 of this year, I got a new scripture. I even told ya’ll not to get too excited! But I was excited-because it did seem for me as I could find nothing for anyone else! this time the scripture is from Jeremiah 17: 7-10,14-15

But blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, who confidence is in Him. He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.  The heart is deceitful  above all things and beyond cure who can understand it?  I, the Lord search the heart and examine the mind, to reward a man according to his conduct, according to what his deeds deserve…Heal me , O Lord, and I will be healed; save me and I will be saved for you are the one I praise.  They keep saying to me, “Where is the word of the Lord ? Let it now be fulfilled” 

I first gave you those verses on August 18th and September 3rd. Then I was due for my Remecaid on September 14th.  Now these dates are important. USUALLY  by the week before the Remecaid is given, I have started hurting-not this time and certainly the week of, or absolutely, positively the week after. But as I write this, I don’t have any pain! Is that not the greatest thing in all the world?  So I would say that this is proof positive that the Lord God keeps His Promises! (now that I know this-there will be forth coming announcements)



And now it has been a  week again! This time, except for a couple of Doctor appointments, I was in all week, but once again dealing with a bacterial infection. and not much   voice either, but God has beenvery plain spoken with me and I have read the most wonderful  scriptures and devotionals t hat were directed right to me in terms of trusting and of course faith.

I have not been given permission to share all of this yet. but I will share what  I can.

the last 2 -3 weeks have been very difficult physically, regardless of being on antibiotics. I have still had C Diff which is not any fun to have  even if you are on meds. and it was still August, my worst asthma month-it has felt like I have had it all month. Now it  is September and I am starting it off the same way!  And not only me, but I have watched as my family has been attacked. My sister’s husband started his chemo this week. Part of  the “cocktail” is Rituxin. He was on it 20 min, when he started reacting.;He had hives, then the nausea , then a small seizure–all of  this totally freaked both my sister and my brother in law out.And did I mention her youngest son had been out with a virus for most of the week, and her car engine blew something up to the tune  $900$ She called me while I was on the phone with my new BSF Bible teacher–so we immediately prayed.  Then my daughter called. She was on the way to the hospital with my 7  yr old granddaughter. She had a pretty bad  case of bacterial pnuemonia!! I reassured my daughter as much as I could, reminding her that she had also had pneumonia twice one winter and her sister once!! That medically things were so much better now and that I was sure that our girl was going to be fine.I would be praying and so would all my great friends.  (of course I was right. the doc thought 4 days. she was only in for 2)

Suddenly my eyes were opened and I could see that my family is being attached even more than usual==I immediately got on my face before the Lord. I asked Him for  protection because I was going to have to confront this  devil -, I am even having to type this a third time-my words keep disappearing on me!  I remind you Satan who won? I did! Because of Jesus!! Go Back to Hell and Leave ME and MY FAMILY alone in the name of Christ Jesus the Son of the Living God!

So let’s go back to last Sunday night and my first scripture. I will type what I can, but there is a lot. I may have to let you look up too.  or I am send you to a particular blog .  Numbers 23: 19-20  God is not a man,  that he should lie, nor a son of man, t hat he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act?  Does he promise and not fulfill? I have received a command to bless;  he has blessed it, and I cannot change it

Is that not just the most beautiful 2 verses? And given to me 2 minutes after I asked for confirmation!  The Lord really wanted me to know, didn’t he?  And then the next day He sent me to Avie’s Place a blog I follow-what a wonderful teacher of the Word she is! Today is was Psalm 119:1658 Great peace have they who love your law, and nothing can make you stumble.  I wait for your salvation, O Lord, and I follow your commands.  I  obey your statutes, for I love them greatly. I obey your precepts and your statutes, for all my ways are known to you.  This post was about peace, the peace you get when you trust absolutely. and then I think this was next although I wondered why it wasn’t 2nd.  It is 1st Peter 5:8 -9   Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil  prowls around likes a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings.  Now you see why I needed this verse reminder a little earlier?    

Then we went to Ecclesiastes written by the way by Solomon -son of David, a man after God’s own heart When I read David’s story or even Solomon’s story or anyone’s story for that matter, I know once again that God can forgive anyone, anything, anytime, anywhere–JUST BECAUSE HE LOVES US.  But we do have to be obedient…as Solomon discovered late in life as he also finally found the purpose in life. He had looked for it everywhere,  in everything, But of course our purpose is only fulfilled in our Lord–when He fills up that hole in our hearts  we all come with  —and that hole is only filled by the Holy Spirit of God Himself, then, can you know your purpose. We will be talking about that in the future.”

So my week has been all about the Lord talking trust me, Trust me TRUST ME. The first night that He spoke to me, MY  Lord God said “Cindy, I love you, I love you, I love you, I  love you. ..but you don’t trust me.”…his first words almost and when I said,” no,I do trust you,” He again replied,”” no, you don’t trust me, but you will.”  I have come to find out that Trusting the Lord  with all my heart is the most important  thing to Him NEXT to  Honoring and Loving Him and Putting Him first in all Things.-which is the first and greatest commandment. And I will tell you that it is easier to follow than the learning to trust so completely. How very, very hard it is.But  it is what we are called to do and when the Lord singles you out for something and  He consistently confirms it,  You know you have to do it, even if it scares you, and it doesn’t seem the right thing to do. But Obviously I will know soon if I must do this thing.   and if I must then I will be calling  on you to pray for me like never before. I feel like the t he guy in the Raiders of the Lost Ark or the sequel when t hey   were looking for Jesus’ chalice from the last supper.  He had to take a step out on faith that there was a bridge when there was no evidence of a bridge–but of course as soon as he put his foot out there-it was there for  him. I am hoping for that for me. And I should be able to explain further later this week.




From Romans 3:2-3 (Paul had just asked what what advantage was there to being a Jew) Much in every way! FIRST OF ALL, they have been entrusted with the very words of God! What if some did not have faith? Will their lack of faith nullify God’s faithfulness?  Not at all!  Let God be true, and every man a liar.

The scripture I have chosen may seem a little strange to you.  But to me it says that regardless of  whether people have faith, God is faithful. This was especially important in regards to my brother in law.  Those  were praying with me for him to agree to go to Moffit for a 2nd opinion, will remember my concerns for his fatalistic attitude.

Our first appointment was 2 weeks ago last Thursday. They took a lot of blood for their own testing and talked with him about possible treatments. When we went back last Wednesday for more blood tests and a review of what they had found, we were shocked. After thinking that he had  CLL Leukemia for 3 years,  he doesn’t!

He has splenic B cell marginal zone lymphoma. This is a totally different blood cancer than the leukemia; which of course means that the chemo for the leukemia would be far different  that what will be needed for  the lymphoma. On Tuesday this coming week, he will have a bone marrow biopsy as well as a blood transfusion. (He has gotten severely anemic) Then we will all go back on the 12th. We are to get final  results,  which means for sure the name of what he has! They are still freaked! They will tell us what the latest blood results are, what the bone marrow biopsy showed and finally what treatment is recommended and hopefully everything they know about the lymphoma. The doctor we’ve been talking to and who has been ordering his tests is a CLL Leukemia Doc and we hope to be moved to a  Splenic B Cell marginal zone lymphoma doc.

So again, all I can say is that I am so very thankful to our Lord for HIS faithfulness. I was reading earlier today in Isaiah-yes, my favorite book! and there it said The Lord has NEVER broken a covenant with His people, but His people have broken every covenant with Him.  So  this week  I ask you my friends and fellow believers to pray again for him-for that breakthru- to-for the right doctor, for all of the remaining tests to go well.

Here is a second time in our family that a second opinion has perhaps made a life and death difference.  I  think that everyone with a serious condition or looking at a surgery should get a second opinion.

LYMPH NODES-SPLEEN: SPLENIC INVOLVEMENT BY FOLLICULAR LYMPHOMA This illustration depicts the classic appearance of spleen involved by follicular lymphoma, namely the presence of discrete, miliary, small, white “pearly” nodules throughout the whole parenchyma. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)




Many thanks http://writerwannabe763.wordpress. com


I hope that anyone who knows me would say I belong in bed right now! I agree! I was! But then this little problem I have with coughing and asthma has decided to interrupt my sleep tonight. It is not so bad that I think I am in trouble, but bad enough for using my nebulizer–so here I sit. I had been disappointed that earlier I hadn’t had time to post tonight and I have so very much to be thankful about this week and today–so I am glad for this opportunity regardless of the reason.

Today was the most awesome day! It was sharing day –the last day of our Bible study class until next September. This is the day when different women from different groups get up and tell the rest of us what God has taught them or done for them this past year. Oh I did want to speak this year!  But I had spoken last year-so it was important to give this time to others. It really was glorious hearing about the miracles that God is doing everywhere. And how a woman had prayed for her husband salvation for over 40 years to see him come to Jesus!  Thank goodness she never gave up!

After the 2hour session, we went to our group leader’s home for fellowship-lunch.This time I was asked to share what was going on with me–I do think I have an exciting job-as a recruiter, I have a chance to make a positive difference in someone’s life every day. I also get to share Jesus so many times. God sends me prepared hearts because He knows I will share His Good News with them. I got to do that every day this week. I also just simply had a good week hunting as I call it. And then yesterday, I spent the day with my client who was in town for a few days of vacation. She asked me if I could take off a day. I said, well, you hired me to search for your  company. That sort of makes you my boss. Can I take the the day off, I asked her? So we spent the day at the beach-of course talked business but inline with how I do it it with the Lord. It was a wonderful time. Somebody who likes hearing my stories! We will see what tomorrow will bring- now I am going to try and go back to bed.

Our Last Bible Study Day For Acts

Oh today what a bittersweet day. We come to the end of our study in Acts that we have had this year in Bible Study Fellowship. I always dislike the summer time because without BSF or a planned study where I am accountable, it is just too easy to get too busy to really study God’s Word! Even as I type this, I find that appalling behavior! I know better! Yet here I am, just like Paul, back doing what I don’t want to do and not doing what I do want to do! This summer, I have purposed to change that behavior! I have invited any of the BSF ladies to join me at either at Starbucks or the nearby Crispers….same day, same time for an an hour and a half of discussion of our weekly Bible study lesson.  I have one study book we could use or there may be other suggestions. But come what may, I will be there every week even if there is only one other person-because then I will be accountable.  What I find really interesting is that I still don’t feel so very “accountable” to the Lord God that I would be so disciplined to do it all on my own.

Maybe I should qualify those statements a little. I do have a quiet time devotional every day where I read a little scripture, a little devotional passage for that day and I pray for so many people and things that need to be done; for a clear, organized mind, the people I will be speaking with today…all of those things come after I am done praising the Lord God of Heaven and Earth. Because I have learned that He wants us to pray a certain way–and praise always comes first. Just like saying hello, how are you doing? and listening politely does for us when we first meet up with a friend. Ah, He is so much more than just a friend!

My God and Father is a Father to me as my earthly father has passed on. So now I do depend on the Lord God to act and steer me, and care for me as a father does for his own children, regardless of their ages. My God and Father is and was and His Son will come and greatly to be praised. Look around you and see what great things the Lord has designed and made! Is He not the most creative and wonderful designer ever? He never runs out of ideas…. every day if you look you can see something new! And the Lord God guides and protects. He hides me in the cleft of the rock, holds me close to His heart, covers me with His feathers, holds me with His strong right arm–and promises to never, ever let me go! Oh as I have read again His promises this week, how thankful I am that I know Him, that I have been given the right to be called His child. Truly I am overcome with His mercy and compassion and love towards me.

This year, studying the lives of Peter and then Paul and Silas and Barnabas and what they endured to spread the Word of the Gospel, showed me that I suffer so little in comparison. If my suffering is just to identify with others so that I can connect with them on that level, then I must surrender to that suffering. For is it not just a little while in comparison with the eternity that whoever I am sharing Jesus with would suffer without Him? I am no martyr! Not trying to make myself out to be one, but I know that it makes a huge difference when you can speak with someone who knows exactly how you feel. Someone who has survived and come out the other side.

So, here is to a summer Bible study and to whomever God will call to it! Pray on that will you?

And please continue to pray for my brother in law. Thank the Great and Good Lord, he has an appointment at Moffit Cancer Center next week! However his red blood cell count is down to 9.4. They transfuse when it is below 9-so you can imagine how funky he feels. Secondly the older brother of another brother in law has been diagnosed with 4th stage pancreatic cancer with about 90 days to live. Of course that is for God to decide, still I don’t think or know that he is a believer. He has 2 little girls who will apparently go to the oldest boy’s family. Please pray for them all. I am asking my Lord to send someone to give them the good news of Jesus! Especially quickly for the sick brother and then for the others and for the children-comfort and care that they will not be bitter to God. As I read on one blog site this week, many agnostics say they stopped believing in God because they lost a loved one at an early age. So that is the specific reason I am asking for this prayer for them-you never know…

My God Is Mighty and All Powerful-yet He Answers Me/Us-Amazing!

This picture shows the sunrise in Borongan Cit...
This picture shows the sunrise in Borongan City, Eastern Samar. Borongan faces the mighty Pacific Ocean to its east. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I hope I can do justice to the day that God called me for today.  Last night, I asked for everyone’s prayers for my brother in law and my family. That for the first time in 18 years he would reach to God–and faced with leukemia and the immediate prospect of chemo, clinical trials, how much time? I guess he listened finally to God’s constant calling to him. I heard from him this morning. I can not begin to express the depth of my feelings–for those of you who have prayed for years for someone.. For those of you who have family or friends suffering with cancer of any kind, you understand.  This is my sister’s husband. She is my prayer partner, my confidant, my dear sister (but I love all of them dearly) and in some ways like my own child in that when she was born, I was 12. I fell in love with her the first time I saw her. I can still remember trying to coax 2 oz down her at midnight or whenever she was up–I was there. I don’t know why–and my mother let me. I did the same for the two that followed her. I like to think we have our own special relationships too.

But THIS sister, she is always there when I am in the hospital, she won’t even let me stay by myself. This sister, she won’t let me die either! not on her watch and my husband trusts her with me. That is saying a lot! Forgive me if I am repeating special things about her. But she is never validated enough by anybody-except maybe some of that is starting to happen for her in her business. She, as I have, has grown too through all this trial and tribulation. She too has an incredible story! of Strength and Loyalty and Pushing Through-Come what may!

Still, there is much work to be done, but at least the path has been started down! The heart is open and ready to receive-May the Lord shine His Light in that heart and do all the work that is needed/was done at the cross/but must be accepted/and now whatever He wants will go forward.

So  much other wonderful things happened today too. All of God’s putting together, of course! I had hoped to go into that a bit, but it is late and I still have one call to make. I promised.

Pray on Warriors! Lift your eyes and see that the fields are full and the workers are few.  I pray that you will find a way to let God use in whatever way you can be used as it seems He has found a way for me.