It’s Hard To Believe It’s Been Five Months…

However, I have just been through the hardest months of my life! As I look back over all I have ever been through, I have often wondered, except for the Lord, I know I would have never made it! That is certainly true of these last few months! Except that this time, I got impatient and angry. I decided it wasn’t fair, in all honesty. I had just had enough. You see in October, I contracted this weird inner ear/balance issue called labrynthitis. Didn’t really get over that before I came down with MRSA and then had to be treated with IV antibiotics, the  first two of which was highly allergic to! But I went every single day from Thanksgiving until February 1, eventually having to have surgery to clean it out. It is a nasty bug and it can always come back.  Then February 4th, I went into the hospital with clots and severe asthma. I spent a week in the hospital with that.

The Lord says He always has a purpose for what He allows in our lives. He definitely believes in “those teachable moments.” Mine came Friday night watching some different people on Christian TV (the 5th). There were so many things said that just broke my heart. I could see that I was exactly where I needed to be. I had already been introduced to new doctors that for the first time in my life actually seemed to get that certain issues that I thought should be addressed would be addressed. Hopefully this isn’t TMI, but I have a clotting problem obviously as this is the third time for clots in my lungs (see my posts from July 2012) and I have had 3 strokes. The hematologist asked me if I was northern European by descent (Scottish, Irish, English)-yes to all. It turns out, they have a known clotting issue. So I find out on this Tuesday if that is one of my problems. The pulmonologist is also first-rate. He has seen me 3 times since I got out of the hospital, even had to send me back last week as I was in the middle of another attack plus bronchitis. He does believe that there are medicines that with the right testing, my life can be turned around. But mostly, I realized, I needed an attitude adjustment!!

On top of that three weeks to the day that I had gone into the hospital, I had to put my husband in as his heart began to fail again. Unfortunately some very poor cardiologists made some bad choices for him in taking him off of his heart medications in the last 2 years and that is pretty much why he is in trouble now, according to the new cardiologist we have. Please pray for him especially! He has prescribed a brand new congested heart failure medicine for him, plus there is going to be lots of new testing in the next several months. We are hoping that he won’t have to have a new pacemaker/defibrillator installed in the fall.

Today’s devotional from JESUS CALLING by SARAH YOUNG is very special to me.

“Trust Me One Day  At A Time. This keeps you close to Me, responsive to My will. Trust is not a natural response, especially for those of you who have been deeply wounded. My Spirit within you is your resident Tutor, helping you in this supernatural endeavor. Yield to His gentle touch; be sensitive to His prompting.

Exert your will to trust Me in all circumstances. Don’t let your need to understand distract you from My Presence. I will equip you to get through this day victoriously, as you live in deep dependence on Me. Tomorrow is busy worrying about itself; don’t get tangled up in its worry-webs. Trust Me one day at a time.”

Psalm 84:12 O Lord Almighty, blessed is the man who trust in you.

Matthew 6:34 therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

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Please understand that I am NOT saying that I do this well at all! I don’t. I haven’t. I am trying. I am sharing this out of my deepest thankfulness for people in my life who have loved me, prayed for me, supported me, cared for me anyway-even when I was so desperate and angry and so weary I wasn’t sure I could go on. Thank the Savior that He understands all of this. That there is such infinite GRACE!

Cindy

In Light of the Recent Planned Parenthood Videos…

There has been a lot of questions, comments from both the “Christian” and secular world. Before anyone reads what I have written, please understand, I am not condemning anyone for an action they may have taken. God is always there to forgive. He says that He forgives all sin even your rejection of Him right up until you die-then it’s too late. I know that’s why Jesus came, because God is love and mercy and grace. But He also requires repentance and acceptance of His Son’s sacrifice, not so that you have to obey a bunch of rules and regulations and “conform.” But so that HE alone, who loves you so much, comes inside that body, that spirit-regardless of what you’ve done, where you’ve been, what you’ve said–and makes you clean and pure again. It’s really a miracle in and of itself. So understand please, I am not holding myself up as a paragon of virtue, but a sinner who found a savior.

I wrote this paragraph below in response to someone’s query of God help us…in response to the videos. He gets a lot of readers to his posts. then I thought I could do no less.

In Psalm 139, it says that God is there when our innermost parts are knit together. Why in the world does no one think that abortion is not murder for convenience? Now that they can sell body parts, it has become about that too. No wonder God has taken His Hand of protection off of America. How can He bear looking down upon our world today?
The disciples asked Jesus when they could look for His coming again. He said, “When it is like the days of Noah.” I would challenge anyone to go back and read about the wickedness on the earth when God was grieved that He had even created man. Yet found one good man, Noah. Noah and his family were saved because Noah listened and believed.
If we were to look around today at the wickedness in our world, I am sure that those in Noah’s world, could not have even imagined such evil! And yet the Lord delays. I am sure it is for that last one to come to know Him in a personal way. They say that thousands in China and across Asia come to Jesus everyday. People in India, and in so many Muslim countries are seeing visions of Jesus or dreaming of Him because that is the only way they might hear of Him, but they want to know the TRUE GOD.
The TRUE GOD says in the book of Isaiah, Seek me, and you will find me.
God is not a liar. Try Him, anyone who reads this and doesn’t know Him.

Something Happened Today

Something marvelous happened today to me through work and I thought I would share it quickly. I do share my faith often with people who I am working with as you may know. In this particular case, a brand new firm that I hope to do business with, the Managing Partner told me last night that unfortunately she would be out today as her daughter was having surgery. I simply remarked that I would pray for her daughter, which I did. What was amazing was the email conversation that started as a result.  That Managing Partner is a fellow believer in Christ. I asked when the surgery was taking place and it was happening as we were emailing. I had already been praying in my spirit, but I stopped everything and began to pray in earnest for this precious daughter. The Lord indicated to me that it was a tumor before I was even told it was a tumor. So I did know how to pray. I wasn’t positive, but I thought I knew what the leading was. When I wrote back and asked “how are things now?” I was told the daughter was out surgery and the tumor looks to be benign. Of course, I was praising God, my amazing, wonderful God for answering our prayers. Two mothers praying together for a daughter. Then I thought, how terrible of me, to not have expected this of my Lord. He answers prayers all the time. The problem is we don’t pray together, believing Him. He who put the stars and the sun and the moon in their places! He can do anything!

I read from Sarah Young and her Jesus Calling devotional. Today it says, TRUST ME IN EVERY DETAIL OF YOUR LIFE. nothing is random in My kingdom. Everything that happens first into a pattern for good, to those who love Me. Instead of trying to analyze the intricacies of the pattern, focus your energy on trusting Me and thanking Me at all times. Nothing is wasted when you walk close to Me. Even your mistakes and sins can be recycled into something good through My transforming grace.

While you were living in darkness, I began to shine the Light of My Presence into your sin-stained life. Finally I lifted you up out of the mire into My marvelous Light. Having sacrificed My very Life for you, I can be trusted in very facet of your life.

But blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him.”  Jeremiah 17:7

We are assured and know that [God being a partner in their labor] all things work together and are [fitting into a plan] for good to and for those who love God and are called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28 AMP

“he drew me up out of a horrible pit {a pit of tumult and of destruction], out of the miry clay (froth and slime), and set my feet upon a rock, steadying my steps and establishing my goings.” Psalm 40:2

“But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.” I Peter 2:9

God is so great and so good to us. He is Risen! He is Risen Indeed!

EVERLASTING LOVE

Isaiah 64: 8 says Yet, O Lord, you are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter; we are the work of your hand.

Isaiah 45:9 Woe to him who quarrels with his Maker, to him who is but a potsherd among the potsherds on the ground. Does the clay say to the potter, ‘What are you making?’ Does your work say, ‘He has no hands?’

Psalm 139: 13-16 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

His love cannot be separated from us, His family and He allows events, health, our families, our jobs, affect/effect, knowing what His overall plan is. Wow that was a mouth full!

What our Lord wants us to do, He says is whenever anything happens, even if we aren’t already right in tune with Him, all we have to do is call out His name! Jesus!

He is Risen! He is Risen indeed!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Hey all, I hope that you had the most blessed of Christmas seasons.

Looking forward to the new year can be exciting. It can also be a time of fear, especially in light of the events going on in our world right now. As I have been reading my Bible,  I am reminded of a favorite scripture: “For I know the plans I have for you, ” declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11. As I refresh myself in the Peace of His Presence, I have gone back to Psalm 31: 19-20 How great is Your goodness, which You have stored up for those who fear You, which You have wrought for those who take refuge in You before the sons of men! You hide them in the secret place of Your presence from the conspiracies of man; You keep them secretly in a shelter from the strife of tongues. And John 16:33 “I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration; but be of good cheer [take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted]! For I have overcome the world. [I have deprived it of power to harm you and have conquered it for you.]

You may be saying that is all well and good Cindy, but how do I actually do it? I understand the question. I had to ask the Lord also because even people like me who know Lord well and know the scriptures well, have difficult times in their lives. Family, jobs, finances, friends, community circumstances, can separately or combine to make even the “strongest Christian” buckle. These things are exactly why we have issues in the churches, in marriages, in families that we do. Who then is the enemy? I’ve said it before. Satan is the enemy. He gets in and will do his best to mess up any family that’s just trying to get along, just trying to go to church, get ahead , just a little. One doesn’t have to be zealous for him to go after that family, because he doesn’t want anybody  anywhere in a Christian church. The name of Jesus Christ [Christ means Messiah] offends many. That’s exactly why you can have little Muslim children praying to Allah in Maryland 5 times a day out of the classroom, but what do you think the uproar would be if you asked for Christian children to be allowed to come out of the classroom even once a day to pray to Jesus Christ? Sorry, I guess I could be considered a zealot for my Jesus!

I know that if I go to Him day by day, I can achieve a victorious life regardless of my circumstances around me. He has been teaching me that for the past several years. It has been a very hard one battle. A very close battle, because as you know there were times I was fighting for my life. There have been times that it has been difficult financially because my husband is retired on social security and I live on commission and so I very much depend on the Lord and what He does in my business. But as Paul said, I have learned to live on what HE gives me and it is enough. I don’t desire more than HE gives. There are so many scriptures that have uplifted me through these years that I cannot begin to list them all, but please indulge as I list a few: The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles.The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Palm 34: 17-18

For we walk by faith, not by sight. 2 Corinthians 5:7;

Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations forever! Amen. Ephesians 3: 20-21

Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus I Thessalonians 5:18 I feel a need to give a bit of commentary here. God did NOT make the bad circumstances, He allowed them. There is a huge difference. Satan always means it for bad, but God can bring good out of the bad. It is a matter of trust.

God is our refuge and strength, an ever present help in trouble. Psalm 46: 1

You know my husband is always saying life with me is never dull! Even though we have not had any late night trips to the ER or terrible illnesses or anything health wise and that was what our life for many years was built around. Now we live in a place I will call almost Paradise. I had on short sleeves today after church, my long sleeve sweater slung over my shoulders. Yesterday we had gone down to the beach to a funky little place a friend had told us about, for lunch.  This was a different beach area than we had visited before so we got out and walked around a bit, a gallery, a music and art store–all funky and fun, before going on to walk on the beach. We will go back again I hope!

What I am saying in my long-winded way is “don’t be afraid” God is right there, reaching out to you. Reach back, He will take your hand. Tell Him you aren’t even sure if He’s real or there. But I assure you HE IS! Just because you doubt, doesn’t make Him less so GOD!  You were created with knowledge of Him, yep, deep down in that heart and soul of yours. And in the quiet of the night, perhaps when everything isn’t so great, because let’s face it NOBODY’S LIFE IS PERFECT ALL THE TIME, that’s the perfect time to reach out.  He’ll be there. I do stake my life on it.

Cindy

Thanksgiving 2014

I know I am very behind in my posts. I do apologize. The last two months especially have been very long, draining days. Not that they weren’t exciting and fulfilling, but every minute seemed to be scheduled with clients and candidates and that’s where my focus had to be. Often I was prepping early or late and so there just wasn’t the down time from before. BELIEVE ME, I am not complaining! This has been more of a gift from God in so many ways I cannot begin to tell you. I would love to give you all the little details about how our Lord is so involved in every aspect of our lives, but of course, confidentiality must win! The great little secret though is starting off your day with the Lord! Don’t tell me for one minute He hasn’t known exactly what I was going to be reading for my day and what I would need, because of course, He always does. Praying before I start my calls, makes the difference, I am convinced. Do I get everyone I want? No, but I get everyone the Lord wants me to work with. I know that’s why I am “doing better” this year, in recruiter numbers, but hopefully more importantly in lives changed for the better, people I’ve spoken to sent on their way-better. Whatever it is that I am supposed to do or say for someone who comes into my sphere that day, that is what I am counting on my God, to open my mouth or put in my mind. He of course, never lets me down!

My husband and I were able to travel and see our children and grandchildren  this past week for the holiday. Another thing I am grateful for-a boss who knew when I needed a break! I was able to see my brother and 3 sisters and families too! A whole lot of cooking was done-some by me! Amazingly I haven’t forgotten how. I was always able to help in my daughter’s beautiful new kitchen. What a pleasure it was to work there! I learned some new tricks and even made a new dish (for me) bouillabaisse. Nice that it turned out and my husband wants it again now that we are home!

What else might I be thankful for? For now anyway, the freedom to worship my Lord God as I choose. The right to bear arms if I choose. The right to drive a car with a valid drivers license-many women in many parts of the world can’t do this. The right to choose what I want to wear, shorts, jeans, a swimsuit, but whatever I choose. Another choice many women don’t have. I work at a job I love, with men and women. Again, not a choice that many women in the world get to make. People say its for their protection. Yeah, I wonder exactly who’s protection? The one who doesn’t want her to know there is a great big world out there? I might havehave been raised “a long time ago” but one thing my parents never did to me or any of my sisters was tell us what we couldn’t be when we grew up. We are all four very different, accomplished women. And my brothers ain’t bad either!

MOST OF ALL, I am thankful what my Lord Jesus Christ did by coming down from heaven, stepping into time as a baby, growing up to be the God/Man who died on that cross at Calvary for me.

G’night

Cindy

What An Interesting Month!

Towards the end of September we went to visit Mayo Clinic in Jacksonville, FL because I couldn’t find a neurologist locally who had any experience with dura fistulas like I had had back in 2009. Dura Fistulas are extremely rare-form in the womb apparently and slowly, in my case anyway, manifest themselves. I’ve already written about the surgeries and the after effects headaches. It’s the year I first started blogging. I remember being so angry with the Lord to let another thing go wrong with me!  Wow and I had no idea of the future did I? It’s a good thing I got past that anger. Anyway, the reason we went was that the soft “squishy spots have  reappeared on my head and I had the headaches again. This all started after the stroke in July. I have literally had a constant headache since July 11. The good news is that they didn’t see a dura fistula in the angiogram that was finally performed. I don’t have all the results yet, but have been gone long enough that if things were an emergency, I think they would have called me. The bad news is no one has any answers either. I could have a repeat of the tiny pseudo tumor underneath my scalp, but I don’t think they are big enough to show up for someone to want to operate on them. And I really, really don’t want any more surgery of any kind this year if I don’t absolutely have to have it. So What Do I Do Now?  What I have always done in the past. I turn to Jesus. He is the only one that knows all things and has all the answers. What I do know is that this keeps me totally dependent upon Him.

One of the things you do when you go to Mayo is wait a lot. So I was prepared with new books. I have always loved to read. These days not as much time to take advantage of it. And God has changed my reading habits. I used to read any and all things especially the mysteries. I grew up on Nancy Drew, the Hardy Boys, The Bobbsey Twins and Cherry Ames. I think that is what makes me a  good recruiter. Being a detective, looking for the needle in the haystack… Still, there are many today that are so graphic, God stops me from reading them before I am 2 or 3 chapters in. So I was thrilled to find a new Christian mystery writer! Her name is Dee Henderson. And honestly, I have never read a book including non fiction that so clearly answers questions, coming at faith from so many different points. Points of deep loss, deep abuse or abandonment, lack of human love. God is and has always been there. Through every moment of a murder, an abuse, a lack a of love, a lie,  He is there.  So I highly recommend  Dee Henderson. I don’t ever think you will be disappointed in anything she has written.

The other thing I have been involved in is a Bible study of the book of Daniel. For those that don’t know of Daniel, he and his 3 friends were part of the inhabitants of Jerusalem that were captured by King Nebuchadnezzar of Babylon. He was the greatest ruler  of the Neo- Babylonian period and one of the most competent monarchs of ancient times. Daniel and his three friends were part of the nobility that were taken to become a part of Babylon and go into the king’s service. Daniel 1:8 Daniel resolved not to defile himself with the royal food and wine, and he asked the chief official for permission not to defile himself this way.  What of course happened is that Daniel and his friends were healthier than any of the other youths who were eating as the Babylonians. What I learned from that lesson what Godliness is never accidental. Neither is victory coincidental. Both stem from up-front, daily resolve-as in time with the Lord! Consistency! The life blood of integrity is becoming the same person no matter where we are-no matter who’s around. When we become people of integrity, everything we are on the inside is obvious on the outside.  That was week 1!

Week 2 was about the dream King Neb had. Get this, he wanted his sorcerers and magicians to tell him what his dream was and then interpret it for him! Talk about difficult!! And if they couldn’t do it, he was going to start chopping them all into little pieces. But because Daniel prayed and asked God what the dream was and what the interpretation was, all the executions were stayed. Remember please that this young man was probably about 18 years old when he did this. But he knew his God. This is the dream and the interpretation. I am including this for those skeptics who don’t believe that God’s Word is true.  Daniel 2: 27-45 Daniel replied, ” No wise man, enchanter, magician,  or diviner can explain to the king the mystery he has asked about, but there is a God in heaven who reveals mysteries. He has shown King Nebuchadnezzar what will happen in days to come. Your dream and the visions that passed through your mind as you lay on your bed are these: As your were lying there O king, your mind turned to things to come, and the revealer of mysteries showed you what is going to happen. As for me, this mystery has been revealed to me, not because I have greater wisdom than other living men, but so that you, O king, may know the interpretation and that you may understand what went through your mind.  You looked, O king, and there before you stood a large statue–an enormous, dazzling statue, awesome in appearance. The head of the statute was made of pure gold, its chest and arms of silver, its belly and thighs of bronze, and its legs of iron, its feet partly of iron and partly of baked clay. While you were watching, a rock was cut out but not by human hands. It struck the statute on its feet of iron and clay and smashed them. Then the iron, the clay, the bronze, the silver and the gold were broken into pieces at the same time and became like chaff on a threshing floor in the summer. The wind swept them away without leaving a trace. But the rock that struck the statue became a huge mountain and filled the whole earth.  This was the dream, and now we will interpret it to the king. You, O king, are the king of kings. The God of heaven has given you dominion and power and might and glory; in your hands he has placed mankind and the beasts of the field and the birds of the air. Wherever they live, he has made you ruler over them all. You are that head of gold.  After you, another kingdom will rise, inferior to yours. Next, a third kingdom, one of bronze will rule over the whole earth. Finally, there will be a fourth kingdom, strong as iron–for iron breaks and smashes everything–and as iron breaks things to pieces, so it will crush and break all the others. Just as you saw that the feet and toes were partly of baked clay and partly of iron, so this will be a divided kingdom; yet it will have some of the strength of iron in it, even as you saw iron mixed with clay. As the toes were partly iron and partly clay, so this kingdom will be partly strong and partly brittle that will never be destroyed, nor will it be left to another people. It will crush all those kingdoms and bring them to an end, but it will itself endure forever. This is the meaning of the vision of the rock cut out of a mountain, but not by human hands– a rock that broke the iron, the bronze, the clay, the silver and the gold to pieces.

The God of Heaven knows all things. These are the kingdoms being spoken of: Head of Gold-Kingdom of Babylon, Chest and Arms of Silver-Medes and the Persians, Belly and Thighs of Bronze-Greeks(Alexander the Great), Legs of Iron-The Roman Empire, The Feet–the kingdom to come -perhaps even now forming among the European and Roma countries?

Of course Daniel’s words of prophecy were true because every kingdom announced came one after the other. That is how you know a true prophet, you know. He is never wrong.

I think that is enough for today even though we are already up to Daniel 6 this last week. What I can tell you is that I don’t want to be absorbed into the Babylon that is our world. That is the one lesson from the Lord that has been constant with me every week. I’ll do my best not to wait another month to post! I’ll be way too far behind.

Goodnight and God bless,

Cindy