WAITING

This is my devotional today…from Sarah Young, Jesus Calling. I am sharing it because this seems to be the story of my life. Waiting to get better, waiting for people to call me back, for deals to close, for the weather to change…anything and everything at all.  But the Lord says in Lamentations 3:24-26 …The Lord is my portion: therefore I will wait for him. The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him: it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.

“Waiting on ME means directing your attention to ME in hopeful anticipation of what I will do. It entails trusting ME with every fiber of your being, instead of trying to figure things out yourself.  Waiting on ME is the way I designed you to live: all day, every day. I created you to stay conscious of me as you go about your daily duties.

I have promised many blessings to those who wait on ME: renewed strength,  living above one’s circumstances, resurgence of hope, awareness of MY continual Presence. Waiting on ME enables you to glorify ME by living in deep dependence on ME, ready to do MY will. It also helps you to enjoy ME; in MY Presence is fullness of Joy.”

Now having read this, perhaps you see why it meant a lot to me today. There are promises there for me and others if we will just wait on our Lord to do the things HE has promised He will do. Of course its hard to wait patiently! If you know me, you that is my greatest weakness! Still, I admit to being worn out. I need to just rest in the knowledge that HE is taking care of my every need–physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  I hope you can too.

Cindy

 

Update March 2018

It’s hard to believe that it’s been so very long since I’ve written anything here. I can only apologize as life got even crazier than last year.

After I was diagnosed with orthostatic hypotension, I did meet with an great new neurologist. Of course he’s in Panama City, but so worth the drive. After the best, most thorough neurological exam I’ve ever had, I asked if he had a thought as to what I have. Yes, he thought I might have MSA (Multiple system atrophy) which is the worst part of Autonomic Dysfunction. Of course I had never heard of either, so I did quite a bit of research, even bought the book The Dysautonomia Project.  Talk about eye opening! Dysautonomia is why I have had so many things wrong with me over the years that I have recounted in this very blog! Autonomic Dysfunction means that the the things that your body does normally, mine does not. Mine is broken and has been for years! Unfortunately they really don’t teach much at all about this in medical school. This is why I’ve gone so very many years without a diagnosis. Think about all of the things your body does without your thinking about it! Starting at the top without involving the actual brain—your eyes, blinking, tearing. Mine have been “the driest any Ophthalmologist has seen ever”   I now have to put RX drops in 4 times/day. My nose. I think I’ve already blogged about getting an aspergillosis fungus in my sphenoid sinus back in 1998. What a miracle it was that Mayo Clinic identified it and operated “just in time” to save my life. And by the way, one only gets exotic germs like this with a compromised immune system, but this was years before I understood that. I went through many more surgeries—cysts in my throat, my gallbladder, full of infection and stones, my colon and kidneys, stones and bubbles due to adhesions that I grow anywhere and everywhere. It was why I had to have a total hysterectomy at twenty-two. Adhesions had destroyed my tubes. I had cysts all over my ovaries. What a miracle it was for me to finally have a child at twenty one, thirteen months previously when I had been told I would never get pregnant or if I did, carry that child to term as I had lost three very early in the pregnancies. Continue reading “Update March 2018”