CindyFrench-stranger than fiction stories

about facing life with hope and confidence, no matter the diagnosis

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It is getting stranger!

Posted by Cindy H French on 09/05/2009

I saw a neurosurgeon today. He is the same great doctor that has fused 4 disks in my neck three times. He looked at the MRI pictures of my head and then felt around my crown for the tumor and said “We are taking this out  Tuesday!’ Wow! I certainly did not think anything would happen so soon, but he could see that the tumor had definitely grown in the last 2 wks since the MRI. Apparently there is the supposition that this is not a lipoma, but something else and the faster we get it to a pathologist, better the treatment! I am certainly all for that! Waiting for surgery is the absolute hardest thing to do. Your imagination runs wild.

I feel so privileged that he will still see me and treat me–it was 4 years ago last month that I had a stroke after the surgery that he and an orthopedic doctor performed to fix a disk in my neck that had herniated into my spinal cord. The stoke was absolutely not their fault in any way. We found out that the PCA pump to give demerol for pain had been misprogrammed and I got 3 times too much of a dose. I bottomed out, and when my husband found me the next morning I was not breathing. Even though I had a living will, he automatically called for help and I spent 3 days in ICU on a narcane drip-totally asleep and out of it. To this day, I have no memories of that time! When I finally woke up, I found that I could not speak  except for whispers and could not swallow correctly. Apparently, the stroke had affected my vocal cords and swallow ability. I spent 18 months going through surgeries and speech therapy trying to get my voice back. I have to be honest. I have heard the tapes! It was painful to listen to me try and speak! At first it was a whisper,then the worst of the frog! At 18 months past the surgery, the doctors said they could do no more for me. I would just have to adjust. But I have always believed that my job (recruiting) is my ministry-much less anyone else I run in to–I could not imagine that God wanted me to be silent!

I went to my pastors at my church. I asked them to anoint me with oil and pray over me-just as the Bible instructs for the sick. They did and within days and then weeks my voice became stronger and stronger! To this day, my clients and candidates and associates who went through that time with me are amazed. My doctor admits I am a talking miracle.

So as I have re-built my practice-after having the most incredible, supportive boss and team a person ever could ask for-we came to an economy that was being killed-especially in key markets-and I have watched in awe as God as provided regardless.

So here I am facing having my head partially shaved on Tuesday and letting them open up my scalp, hoping that the skull is not involved. I know that the surgeon really doesn’t know what exactly the tumor is-but I know he will get it all and be truthful with me as to where we go from here….hopefully only a hair extension…but God has not seem fit to deal with me simply in the past, so I know I have to be prepared for anything. my doctor of course, is scared to death of anything going wrong, even to having the same anesthesiologist that took out my gall bladder last year work with me Tuesday!

Here’s my take on this: I think I still have things to do. I am just involved in a new ministry at my church, GriefShare. We’ve had 2 wonderful weeks with more and more people coming and freely sharing. I think God wants me to be a part of that.

I am also a prayer partner with my sister-the other half of my heart. We truly are “joined at the hip” as my dad used to say. We need each other to survive this world, I think. Surely God is not ready to pull me away from her…

And my immediate family…I know that I am the catalyst. That is not ego, it is what they tell me. Because I believed, they found their OWN belief. I have grandchildren I want to share that with.

And then there is my business as a recruiter. Yes, I am professional to the T. I do the right thing in all instances, regardless of the cost to me. Like Esther in the Old Testament, I believe that I was put here for “such a time as this” to share the Good News-The Messiah has come! Read about it thru out the old testament into the new-simply asking God to show what is real! 

I could not survive any other way! By now, truly, I would have slit my wrists, or just gone to sleep-into eternity, but I know that I know that MY GOD has a purpose in everything He does. And I bow to it.


One Response to “It is getting stranger!”

  1. Deborah Woodward Adornato said

    You are beautiful. You are in my prayers for a good outcome
    Let me hear from you

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