To Act Without Knowing How You function is not good; and if You Rush Ahead, You Miss Your Goal.

That is from Proverbs 19: 2. My emphasis tonight is the rushing ahead. I am not going to as I usually do-rush what you say? Our move back to Atlanta, Ga after 30 years in Florida. I did think I would spend the rest of my life here. I do love and the weather. I have come to love our little house that the Lord gave us too and often tell the story of how we came to it.  I love my BSF group and will probably miss them the most. I have made some dear friends here.  So how was I rushing? We knew that we were going to move back up to Atlanta when our lease was up in June, so we thought to look around and see what kind of housing might be available for what kind of money. We found a great apartment with superb amenities. There were only 2 negatives. The kitchen was miniscule. (even to their drawers-only one large one and across the room, one very small one.) Since the point of our arrangement is for me to slow down and take lots better care of myself,   He’s been doing the cooking and shopping for us. So if HE said He could deal with the kitchen, then why should I worry about  it  all the time? So what did I do/not do?  First I presented our dilemma to our landlady…who could not have been more gracious and understanding. And She went me one farther, find your place and then move. Go ahead and be packing, know that God is in everything. aaah, how our God does work. .So after speaking with the landlady and getting the green light, Dennis just started packing away. We were to call the apartment people that our daughter had gone over and spoken with on Saturday and fill out an online app and overnight an application fee. But as we started to do those final thing, I was certain, that I was rushing and it wasn’t good. I looked at my husband and said the same to him. I think I shocked twenty years off of him, but as we prayed and our spirits calmed, we knew we were making the right decision. It may not seem that way for the world because in all liklihood we will lose the apartment.  For us that certainty was a hard decision. but, we believe if that happens God just has something better for us. 

Still Trusting-And For So Much More Now!

My world has changed  since I last wrote!  First my husband came in my office last week and said he was ready to move to Atlanta!! Now for those of you who do not know me or my background, I moved to Atlanta at age 16, not very happily but eventually it was home. Then in my early to mid 30′s  in 1984 it was,  we moved to Tampa. I was very happy with the move. My parents lived in Orlando and I could see about them regularly. I loved the weather and overall we have done pretty well here. However our children went home to Tampa after college and now that is where my grandchildren are. I am learning every day how short life really is and those precious moments that I could be with them, I’ve been here out of fear in some cases, because I believe I have some extraordinary doctors taking care of me and have wondered how in the world I would replace them. Of course, my Abba Father has brought this to my attention-the lack  of faith on my part that He wouldn’t help me identify the right doctors to take care of me there. And as for the cold, well, I can dress for it. But it is an easy trade to be with my girls-all of them!!

We talked about moving two or three years ago, but at that time, my husband still had that double machine in his chest and was still in a lot of pain and the cold made it worse. So after all of my plans with my wonderful boss, we scrapped it all and stayed.  And of course with the craziness of my body this past 2 years I guess this is where God wanted me to be.  Still, I am very thankful that I can work out arrangements  to continue to work for Gary and MRI, stay insured and widen my client base. I believe I can resurrect some old clients. I was just speaking with 2 of those very special ladies I did work for 10 and 11 years ago for the first time last week. It was pretty thrilling to me to be so well remembered.

Of course we can not leave until next July1 when our lease is up. I know that sounds like such a long time! But  to us and especially to my husband who will bear the brunt of the packing up and the putting back in order this lovely villa just the way we found it, he will need every day of every month that we have!  We have so loved it here. I was planning on seeing if we could sign up for 2 more years right after Christmas, so you can imagine my big surprise! But how lovely a surprise. NOW MS. DIANE, I don’t have to be the little bit jealous of you that I was with your move. I could certainly understand it. I too will be limited in how much I can do or help. which leads me to my second surprise. And this one isn’t so pleasant. I had more of what I would call a seizure coming home from church today. My husband was driving, I had started to say something, but all of a sudden my neck got rigid and my head was turning back and forth and I was saying with difficulty no, not , no, not. My right hand was holding on to the door handle-I thought if I let go of it, my arm would go flying. I don’t know that, that would be true, it was just a feeling.  This went on for a full minute-to a minute and half and now stands as the weirdest thing  that has ever happened to me. A couple of things I did notice and have continued having pain and just weird feeling with is my neck. Especially if I have it tilted down to read or I am paying attention to my hands on the keyboard too long. What I had alluded to last week physically is that I am having some similar issues with my head like I did when I had those tumors back in 2009. I don’t know that this is a reoccurance, because my neck wasn’t involved at all then, and it definitely is now. So after speaking to a sub neurologist, mine was out of town. I will be making calls in the morning and hoping to get some testing done. What I would ask you dear friends is your prayers. There is nothing, absolutely nothing like having your friends and loved ones pray for you. This may come to nothing like in March–but I know it was worse, and harder on me and God forbid that I would have been driving.  So now I have a driver for awhile! So let’s hope and pray that someone will have some answers this time.

 I will try and keep up some regular posts to let you know what’s happening. I realized with Diane not well and moving how hard it was waiting to hear. So I will try and be good about it.

The previous post was written last night. I didn’t publish because I wanted to speak to my boss, my doctor and see what was up before I sent out such a disquieting post!  The bad news is that I had another episode this morning. And I still believe that my neck is somehow involved. We did go down and see my neurologist, but unfortunately, this is not her area of expertise. She had no ideas of what to tell me to do or who to see or even what basic tests could be run-which I can guess myself what 2 basic tests would be. So my surgeon referred me to another doctor right at end of the business day so I will have to call for an appt  tomorrow.. In the meantime, I am working carefully and asking the Lord to protect us, bless us, go before us.

THE LORD IS WORKING ON MY TRUST FACTOR

And now it has been a  week again! This time, except for a couple of Doctor appointments, I was in all week, but once again dealing with a bacterial infection. and not much   voice either, but God has beenvery plain spoken with me and I have read the most wonderful  scriptures and devotionals t hat were directed right to me in terms of trusting and of course faith.

I have not been given permission to share all of this yet. but I will share what  I can.

the last 2 -3 weeks have been very difficult physically, regardless of being on antibiotics. I have still had C Diff which is not any fun to have  even if you are on meds. and it was still August, my worst asthma month-it has felt like I have had it all month. Now it  is September and I am starting it off the same way!  And not only me, but I have watched as my family has been attacked. My sister’s husband started his chemo this week. Part of  the “cocktail” is Rituxin. He was on it 20 min, when he started reacting.;He had hives, then the nausea , then a small seizure–all of  this totally freaked both my sister and my brother in law out.And did I mention her youngest son had been out with a virus for most of the week, and her car engine blew something up to the tune  $900$ She called me while I was on the phone with my new BSF Bible teacher–so we immediately prayed.  Then my daughter called. She was on the way to the hospital with my 7  yr old granddaughter. She had a pretty bad  case of bacterial pnuemonia!! I reassured my daughter as much as I could, reminding her that she had also had pneumonia twice one winter and her sister once!! That medically things were so much better now and that I was sure that our girl was going to be fine.I would be praying and so would all my great friends.  (of course I was right. the doc thought 4 days. she was only in for 2)

Suddenly my eyes were opened and I could see that my family is being attached even more than usual==I immediately got on my face before the Lord. I asked Him for  protection because I was going to have to confront this  devil -, I am even having to type this a third time-my words keep disappearing on me!  I remind you Satan who won? I did! Because of Jesus!! Go Back to Hell and Leave ME and MY FAMILY alone in the name of Christ Jesus the Son of the Living God!

So let’s go back to last Sunday night and my first scripture. I will type what I can, but there is a lot. I may have to let you look up too.  or I am send you to a particular blog .  Numbers 23: 19-20  God is not a man,  that he should lie, nor a son of man, t hat he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act?  Does he promise and not fulfill? I have received a command to bless;  he has blessed it, and I cannot change it

Is that not just the most beautiful 2 verses? And given to me 2 minutes after I asked for confirmation!  The Lord really wanted me to know, didn’t he?  And then the next day He sent me to Avie’s Place a blog I follow-what a wonderful teacher of the Word she is! Today is was Psalm 119:1658 Great peace have they who love your law, and nothing can make you stumble.  I wait for your salvation, O Lord, and I follow your commands.  I  obey your statutes, for I love them greatly. I obey your precepts and your statutes, for all my ways are known to you.  This post was about peace, the peace you get when you trust absolutely. and then I think this was next although I wondered why it wasn’t 2nd.  It is 1st Peter 5:8 -9   Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil  prowls around likes a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings.  Now you see why I needed this verse reminder a little earlier?    

Then we went to Ecclesiastes written by the way by Solomon -son of David, a man after God’s own heart When I read David’s story or even Solomon’s story or anyone’s story for that matter, I know once again that God can forgive anyone, anything, anytime, anywhere–JUST BECAUSE HE LOVES US.  But we do have to be obedient…as Solomon discovered late in life as he also finally found the purpose in life. He had looked for it everywhere,  in everything, But of course our purpose is only fulfilled in our Lord–when He fills up that hole in our hearts  we all come with  —and that hole is only filled by the Holy Spirit of God Himself, then, can you know your purpose. We will be talking about that in the future.”

So my week has been all about the Lord talking trust me, Trust me TRUST ME. The first night that He spoke to me, MY  Lord God said “Cindy, I love you, I love you, I love you, I  love you. ..but you don’t trust me.”…his first words almost and when I said,” no,I do trust you,” He again replied,”" no, you don’t trust me, but you will.”  I have come to find out that Trusting the Lord  with all my heart is the most important  thing to Him NEXT to  Honoring and Loving Him and Putting Him first in all Things.-which is the first and greatest commandment. And I will tell you that it is easier to follow than the learning to trust so completely. How very, very hard it is.But  it is what we are called to do and when the Lord singles you out for something and  He consistently confirms it,  You know you have to do it, even if it scares you, and it doesn’t seem the right thing to do. But Obviously I will know soon if I must do this thing.   and if I must then I will be calling  on you to pray for me like never before. I feel like the t he guy in the Raiders of the Lost Ark or the sequel when t hey   were looking for Jesus’ chalice from the last supper.  He had to take a step out on faith that there was a bridge when there was no evidence of a bridge–but of course as soon as he put his foot out there-it was there for  him. I am hoping for that for me. And I should be able to explain further later this week.

 

             

Todays’ News-Aurora Colorado Mass Shooting

In Isaiah 24-most of the chapter is about how the Lord God is going to devaste the earth-this will happen in those last 7 years before Jesus comes back to triumphantly defeat Satan at Armageddon.  Already we are seeing the beginnings of this as our world’s face is ruined and people scattered due to “natural weather events” which are more violent, more often, in evey place in the world than ever in history.

Now we have mass killings starting-sometimes for stated reasons- like in the name of Allah, or “we hate everybody–but in Colorado, just a guy who went into a theatre armed and ready to kill and once done, just giving up to the police-no explanation, no brave words. I guess he didn’t like the movie! Of course this all plays into our Attorney General’s hands and his “we have no right to have guns policy” and his determination to get rid of what we Americans have always considered our inalieable right to bear arms. He will say if we had a no guns policy this would not have happened. I say if you are the criminal element, you can always put your hand on a gun. It will be the average citizen who will be hurt in this.

Still, the reason for my writing this morning is not my particular soap box, but to call you to pray for these families who have been suddenly hit by death or were one of the more that 40 wounded.  Pray this :You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord , the Lord is the Rock eternal. Isaiah 26: 3-4

Remeber, the countdown has started in heaven. Things are only going to get worse here. Don’t delay your witness to your loved ones, your friends, your neighbors. What will it matter what they think when very soon they are facing eternity without a safety net? The ONE you could have told them about-if you believed enough, cared enough, loved enough-because this is what it comes down to. Satan will get them otherwise.

Oh how I love you all with the love God has put into my heart! How I understand so much better Paul’s writings now and his willingness to be poured out for those so that they too could know his Savior. As I told a Doctor this week, after you’ve had the Lord in your corner in the ER, how could you not tell everyone you meet of HIM and His love for them-and His Plan for their Salvation?

FINISH THE QUESTIONS THAT GO WITH THE AWARD AND THEN PAY IT FORWARD

I  am to answer the next 10 questions and then list nominate at least 5 min, 10 max bloggers that I appreciate or have been especially encouraging to me. So to those bloggers you will do the same.

1.  What is my favorite color? red, but then yellow would be a very close second

2.  What is my favorite animal? my Yorkshire terrier of course!

3. What is my favorite non – alchoholic drink? well that depends on the time of the day and do I need a pick-me-up. I must have gatorade and coke zero

4. Do I prefer Facebook or Twitter? I am 60, need you ask?

5. What is your favorite pattern? small houndstooth

6. Do I prefer giving or getting presents? I love to give-I can’t take anything with me after all.

7. What is my favorite number? 13 I

? each day is my favorite because I can be sharing Jesus with someone who opens his/her heart to Him 

9. What is my favorite flower? I blue iris, yellow roses, lily of the valley

10. What is my passion? That’s easy!  To know Jesus Christ in all of His Fullness and to share that with whomever the Father brings to me. of course writing about it all is pretty obessive too.

There are some writers that probably have been given so many awards so many times I am not sure that another will fit. but each of these ladies were with me in the begining. It was their encouragement that kept me writing regardless of how I felt: Marianne http://God’sPromisesAreReal.wordpress.com ; Joyce http://joycedevivre.wordpress.com; Debra http://TellGodThankyou.wordpress.com ; Jo http://momentumofjoy.wordpress.com ; Dee http://lillies,sparrowsandgrass.wordpress.com ; Steven http://totheassemblywithlove.wordpress.com ; Rob http://settledinheaven.org

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• Awards Received and Passed On! (lovinglifeagreenjourney.wordpress.com)

A NEW AWARD!! READER APPRECIATION!!

 

AKA THE ENCOURAGEMENT AWARD

Many thanks http://writerwannabe763.wordpress. com

Back To The Tongue Ist Peter 4:11

Cover of What Jesus Would Say

I have said that the Lord was really dealing with me on the subject of my speech. Sometimes others might wonder, Cindy how do you know? Well, the Lord confirms over and over by the scripture He gives me to ponder over in my study either in my formal Bible study or my daily devotional-sometimes both-a double whammy! Then I know it is important!

In my lesson, it is very obvious that one can only overcome a sin, a habit, by the power of the Holy Spirit. But once you have been made aware of the problem and you’ve asked for help, it is also incumbent upon you to invoke you own will and discipline because our Lord has given us a choice in all things, including being obedient in coming clean!

“If anyone speaks, he should do it as one speaking the very words of God.” I Peter 4:11

Grabs you, doesn’t it? Makes you not want to even open your mouth at all! Because can any one of us imagine speaking the very words of God? But we all do! Think about your witness everyday. Those that know that you are a believer-that hear what comes out of your mouth! Is it what Jesus would say? Do we always speak in gentleness and love and truth? and WHO am I to even ask this when I only speak with a voice by the grace of God!(yes I blogged about getting my voice back miraculously after 18 months of no voice after a stroke in 05) So you see why God my Father might be after me a little more than the average person?

I’ll go back even further, to Romans 14. Paul is giving the believers instructions in what to do, not to-even what to eat, not to eat-or drink as the case maybe. Actually he says that all food is clean, but that is our weaker brother would stumble because of something that they saw us do or say or eat or drink in our strength-then we are wrong in our actions because the kingdom of God is not a matter of behavior and speech but of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.

How great is our God! He brings something to our notice! Then He gives the power to overcome it! And continually supports that effort by sending  parts of His word our way along with prayer support until all is overcome. I love Him! I praise Him-He is not a Bully, but so gentle and loving and careful and compassionate, even as He cuts away that which is evil or diseased in me.

I have given Him permission to go into every room in my Spirit. Have you?

 

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Bacon and Balsamic Glazed Sugar Snap Peas Recipe

I tried this last night-it was great-even to a husband who doesn’t like “interesting” things!

Ingredients:

1/4 lb of bacon.  (I used 4 slices)

1 1/2 cups of fresh sugar snap peas  ( I had a cup)

2 Tbsp Balsamic vinegar ( I used one+ a little)

1 tablespoon RAW sugar  ( I used 1 tbsp of splenda)

salt and pepper to taste. Serve immediately

Cook minced bacon in a large skillet over  med hig heat until the fat has rendered out and the bacon has begun to crisp. About 5 min. Remove w/a slotted spoon and set aside. leave the bacon fat in the skillet.  Add the sugar snap peas, ande toss w/the fat.  Cook and stir until just cooked through, about 5 minutes.  Pour in the vinengar, sugar, and cooked bacon Continue cooking until the balamic  has reduced, and the sugar has dissolved, about 2 minutes. Season to taste with salt and pepper

Relief! Finally!

What a week! So busy with work-yeah! I do love what I do! Helping people find a new “best job”. Helping the client find someone who so “fits in”. I believe it’s a gift that God has given me! All along, I am often able to share Jesus’ story, because it is so much a part of me and what I do!

So this week on Wednesday, I had another nerve block for the occipital neuralgia. This time, I was given different drugs and it was so much better. Even the night time was better-which had so far been the worst time. It also has worked so far!! Very little headache, no dizziness. On Thursday, I went to the gastroenterologist for my biopsy results. Thank God, we had decided to check out the nausea, vomiting, and burning I had been having. This  was NOT related to my head! It seems that I had polyps in my throat and stomach. The biopsy said that I have ulcerated, inflamed tissue. Thank God, no cancer. Still, I will have to be checked once a year from now on.  Truly between the great nerve block and good biopsy, I have just been giddy with thanksgiving! Hopefully the worst is over now!!

So in looking back over the last six months, I can see how even with “rare”, physical issues, the hand of God was on my life. He had a neurosurgeon “standing by” with my first surgery. He gave me a wonderful scalp/skull surgeon for the 2nd surgery so that my head is not deformed after all the biopsies taken, He has given me new friends to call on, sympathize with, understand with. And finally, allowed me to see His love  through my Pastors and church family. He has shown me again His love and care even in providing my successful work, so that the bills can be paid. God is Great!!

More and More, Better and Better

We came right back from Christmas in Atlanta to pre-op and  then surgery on the second hole in my head. They opened up my scalp and followed the spinal fluid leak, along with looking for other holes. Once again, cutting off all that was growing out of the hole, then sewing my head back up. Believe it or not, I went home that evening-way too soon for me! I woke up at midnight feeling like my head was going to explode-pretty horrible pain. Putting ice on my head and taking the painkillers got me through the night, but just barely. And so began, my first week of the new year. Taking so much Vicodin (yes, prescribed dosage), my pharmacist said I had to switch to something else or I’d be in liver failure in 2 wks. So then there was the percoset which did a better job and I thought I was getting better. But oh no, here comes the headache again, only made worse by bending over or coughing, vomiting-the pressure was once again excruitiating! This time, the surgeons turned me back over to the neurologist. They said they had fixed what obviously needed to be fixed and had no ideas of where to go from here.

After speaking with the neurologist at length, a spinal tap was scheduled. I thought, “surely, this will resolve all my problems. I’ve just got too much pressure now after not enough pressure before”. Maybe true, maybe not, but unfortunately for me, the spinal tap showed abnormal fluid and being one of those 5% of the population that the tap hole doesn’t close, I developed a headache that became truly unbearable along with a case of atypical menningitis. I was a sick puppy and went back into the hospital this last week. Demerol every 3 hours around the clock was a wonderful release from so much pain for so long! After the 2nd tap and then blood patch, that headache was gone, the antibiotics had cleared up the menningitis, but the original headache was back-not beginning to be as bad as it had been, but the longer I am up, the worse it gets.

So after 4 days in the hospital, I came home and then we saw the neurologist again on Friday. He believes that I have to very slowly adjust to being up, take the pain meds, but on a reduced basis and eventually my head will settle down. It HAS had a lot done to it in a short amount of time! And the kind of surgery I’ve had could mess with the spinal fluid, so for now, I am trying very hard to take his advice. Just be up 2 hours at a time and then down for two. Hopefully, he is right. Worst case, we’ll know pretty quickly if he is wrong…